Gambling doesn’t mean much to me
I might have the odd bet or two
But others are almost fanatical
So what does wagering achieve for you?
For a start it gets rid of your money
Which you’ve laboured so hard to earn
Its not as if you have made that much
That you’ve got plenty of it to burn!
So, when the National Lottery started
I thought, “Is it worth all the fuss?”
Perhaps it will benefit the nation
And the charities that depend upon us.
The odds against winning are enormous
You’re more likely to be hit by a train!
But you bet a big slice of your wages
And it all slips away, down the drain!
But if it’s a people’s national lottery,
And the profits go to a very good cause
It helps to salve individual conscience
And turns a few wolves from the doors.
In truth our scheme has gone a bit sour.
Instead of the nation getting the lot,
Most profits were quickly diverted,
To America, via the firm Camelot!
There was talk of Mafia connection
And underhand dealings as well
And payouts retained by Camelot
So all was not well, you could tell.
But, as the contract came to and end,
There were many cries for a quick need to pause
And consider a British organisation
Giving much more to a selected good cause.
To the front of the queue strode a leader
An entrepreneur with vision and flair
Who outlined ways to a new future
And the steps to take us right there.
Not only was he a talker
He demonstrated his prowess as well
And got the thumbs up from the nation
Funds for good causes would start to swell.
But we reckoned without altercation
And Camelot began to fight
Using every trick it could find in it’s book
To put Branson in very sore plight!
They hit upon favourite politicians
Then all of the people with sway
They weren’t going to take this lightly.
And have their plunder taken away!
So what seemed to be a sure winner
That Virgin would win out at last
Became a national sensation
When their effort was suddenly bypassed!
No”, said the chairman, “I’ve decided.
And I don’t need to talk to ‘that lot’
I’m very attracted by the other side.
And the winner is …. Camelot!”
You could have knocked me down with a feather!
What a crass and classic mistake
From such an eminent chairman
Who surely can’t be ‘on the take’?
So we’re stuck with an American Lottery.
The people’s scheme goes to the wall.
Well they can stick it up right up their T-shirts.
‘Cos I’m not going to do it at all!
We seem to be very talented,
There’s no other way it can be put
At depriving ourselves of opportunity,
And shooting ourselves in the foot,
Good luck to you Richard Branson
They’ve tried to make you look small
This insidious organisation
Is bound to take a big fall.
I hope that you’ve got a big pocket
With plenty of tricks stored therein
So you take the fight right back to them
And end up with a glorious win!
Because I want a true national lottery,
To which all the British nation flocks.
Where the benefits go to very good causes
And not to an American Fort Knox.
by N. Sanity.
Author: Trevor Durbidge Copyright © 2001 [TJD]. All rights reserved. Revised: October 30, 2007 .